Finding More Meaning in the “Not Doing”
It is 6:36 am on the dot. It will never be 6:36 am again, and I relish this realization came out of this unique moment. I take this time of year, these holy days, and moments, very seriously… because for the Jewish people this is the holy portal of time. It is relegated to reflection and contemplation, called the 10 Days of Awe. It began last week with Rosh Hashana and will end with Yom Kippur and calls each one of us, to take introspective time, to think about the meaning of their lives.
This year in particular been particularly challenging and pushed me to the edge of my comfort zone. After 24 years of consecutive preparation for the High Holidays Worship services, am “NOT.” Not worried about the phlegm in my throat, not steaming daily before I sing, writing the last drafts of my Yom Kippur Sermon. In truth …. I did not want to create a new High Holidays , and yet here I am, a Rabbi /Cantor NOT doing services???? Like the reluctant Jonah, I feel I was pushed into pioneering a very much needed, relatable, Jewish experience that could reach our conflicted congregants, our younger people and those who can no longer pretend that they are satisfied with their prior synagogue holiday services.
Many people join a synagogue but only attend once a year, for the High Holydays. It can be likened to visiting an aging grandparent. In the same way we respect the tradition, they show up (to alleviate the guilt and fear that something bad would happen I they did not). His feeling vividly, the room always smelling of moth balls and aging gums, and I wincing at the set of teeth in the waterglass next to the bed. The point being is that you can tolerate the visit, fulfill the obligation as a good daughter, and be happy not to go back for awhile.
Changing the stale experiences of Jewish worship services has been my mission and it has been rewarding and in the realm of possibility. It takes chutzpah, courage and like the name of my synagogue, the Nachshon Minyan, “a leap of faith.”. Updating, and adding the missing meaning of these truly spectacular holidays are game changers. I love the delicate intricacy of preserving the authentic core of the Jewish traditions and blending them with the modern ingredients of spirituality. It takes years of study and trials; and is a fine alchemy that I love sharing and teaching. When I hear comments like, “ Had I only known that I could experience Judaism out in nature, at the beach and not in a stuffy sanctuary, arguing about being late, stuffing myself with salty foods…etc… my Jewish affiliation would have been completely different.“ I ascribe to, the famous quote, “Change one and you can change the world.”
Post Covid, and many other economic, and emotional factors drove me, as the leader of my home-grown congregation to really take a “leap of faith” and put aside my favorite old-style High Holyday Liturgy, and summer sermon writing, choir rehearsals of the musical, and majestic High Holiday Services. I deeply looked forward to (and dreaded at the same time) this responsibility every year. I honestly mourned not preparing the beloved repertoire of Kol Nidre and Avinu Malkeynu etc. At the same time, I listened to that “still small voice,” that urged me to let go, trust, simplify, and allow nature to house the High Holydays. Now, I understand what the great mystic Reb Nachman of Bretzlov must have felt when he created conversations with God in nature,
“As often as you can, take a trip
out to the fields to pray.
All the grasses will join you.
They will enter your prayers
and give you strength to sing
praises to God...
(The Empy Chair, p. 86)
I re- interpreted some of his analogies to fit our Tashlich experience
… Let the waters of the ocean, the grains of sand, the cool winds, and even the dolphin’s sing with us in prayer.
This year, for the “not” conventional Rosh Hashanah/Tashlich service, I invited my Nachshon Congregation to join me at the waters edge of Malibu beach. Donned in my tallit and white robe, special Kippah I waited and was not sure if anyone would come to a “Not Synagogue, no siddur, no frills, Sound Bath ceremony of and letting go, Teshuvah, teaching, journaling, Shofar blowing casting off crumbs, and planting seeds of intentions for the New Year. First there were 10, then 20, 30, 40, 50 souls: and with tears in my eyes I said, Shma Koleynu!!! You heard my voice and I heard Yours. This was my confirmation, for Nachshon’s upcoming year of celebrating nature, and taking a deep dive into more meaningful Jewish Practice. Our classes will explore the ancient texts, alongside nature, art, discussions, and personal spiritual direction. Following the circle and cycles of the Jewish calendar year will add a whole new dimension.
Please join us for our next groundbreaking Sukkot, Simchat Torah “Sha-hike” (Shabbat hike) on October 7, 2023.. Location given when you RSVP today!
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Chag Sameach,
G’mar Chatimah Tova.
With love, Rabbicantor Judy
